Last month, I slept in seven rooms comfortably with expectations that I’m about to experience something new when I wake up. Don’t you just love that feeling of anticipation everytime you travel?
It’s been weeks since I arrived home from my trip. I am trying my very best to catch up with the backlogs and I guess I am slowly but surely putting these experiences into words. I am very thankful with every opportunity that comes my way and I love that feeling of independence.
Right now, I am blogging from my room, seated at the bed and I kind of dislike the fact that I am thinking too much about various stuff. First, my sleeping pattern is ruined again. I tried to sleep a few hours ago, but I woke up when the electric fan started to make unnecessary noise. I can imagine it yelling the words “Fix me!” to me as I stare at it. I think this electric fan is the most loyal yet the most abused thing here in my room. I use it everyday yet I rarely clean it.
I am having some weird dreams lately. I can still remember each segment clearly, but I don’t want to reveal them all here. Last week, it was in a beach setting. The next dream involves me running in a corridor that looked like I am trying to runaway from the corporate set-up. I woke up catching my breath. Ate Lenny apparently woke me up to eat lunch with my grandparents. The other night, it involved me eating popcorn while seated in a comfy couch while staring at a big screen – not sure if it is a giant monitor or a TV screen.
I tried to search for the interpretation of my dreams, and they turned out to be positive in terms of my growth as a person. It s true that I have so many ambitions and goals in my life right now and I am trying to put them in order. I want to succeed in every aspect of my life and I know that I should also put the business and financial aspect into consideration. Anyway, I’m turning twenty five soon and I also need to think about stability.
Sometimes, I get a bit worried and pressured when I am in big gatherings involving some people who are truly close to me (family and friends). Some people have this impression that I am ‘not taking life seriously’ when in fact, I do. I really do. I may not be in the traditional set-up now, but I am not a bum either. I admit that I may slack at times, but when I am at the peak of my productivity, I make sure that I deliver results. I am also thinking about the future, but I have my own way of dealing with it. You may not see the best results now, but with patience and hardwork, I know that I can make this thing work. I know what I want and what I truly need.
I talked to a friend awhile ago. He is relatable since we have the same goals and same dilemma. I told him that I am really used to doing things by myself and not completely depending on anyone. I also miss working in groups or tandems, but I am left with no choice now. Trying to produce a good input alone can be tiring and it might even lead to sudden stress. Not talking to a ‘real’ person face to face can also make one feel uninspired.
It’s 5:30 in the morning and I bet some of my friends are about to wake up to prepare for Monday work in the corporate world. I just realized that my room is a mess, my window is too covered (may blinds na, may curtain pa!), my planner is full of To-Do list that should have been done last week and I am craving for a breakfast meal from Tapa King. Too bad the nearby branch is still closed. Pft.
So there. I only need to let that out. Maybe I am overthinking up to the point that it haunts me when I try to sleep.
Can’t wait to go to the beach.